ATTENTION WHITE PEOPLE

Barack Obama's First Five Initiatives

(According to an email I just got from the GOP)

1. ATTENTION WHITE PEOPLE  

You have 24 hours to turn over your property to the government.  

This includes any and all jewelry, electronics and personal items worth over 2 dollars American.

You are allowed to keep one toothbrush per family.

2. ATTENTION WHITE PEOPLE  

Square Dancing is now a crime and will result in a $500 fine per do-si-do.  

The Charleston, the Cha-Cha and the Quick Step have also been suspended pending further review.  

3. ATTENTION WHITE PEOPLE  

In order to make-up for slavery you are now required to do one chore per week for a black person.  

Your black chore-master will be assigned on a random basis via lottery on January 21, 2009.  

Chores will begin Wednesday of the following week. 

4. ATTENTION WHITE PEOPLE  

Unless you can backwards tomahawk dunk, playing Basketball is now a Class A Misdemeanor.

This means you, Steve Nash.

 

5. ATTENTION WHITE PEOPLE  

You no longer have a “black friend.”

So stop calling and inviting him to play Squash, watch Jude Law movies and other lame white people shit.

He will contact you when the need arises as you are now his "white friend."